Do breasts slow men down when they run? Who cares?
We’ve just read about a ludicrous experiment. We won’t give it weight by linking to it – you can find it if you google. The experiment involved asking male runners to run wearing prosthetic breasts to see if it affected their times. The other facts here to digest are that the ‘breasts’ they wore weighed 1kg and that the men didn’t also wear sports bras to contain their new, temporary appendages.
There’s a lot to think about.
First off, this is a stunt to promote column inches, and yes we’ve fallen into that trap, but we wanted to let you know that we’re not just sitting on our hands and letting stuff like this out into the ether without comment. It’s a risible stunt, and we want to make sure that you all know that it is, and that there is no ‘science’ behind it.
Secondly, there’s the lack of any other evidence retrieval here. No other questions were asked. So what we want to do is ask the questions they should have been asking. And, what’s more, we can answer those questions too. So here we go:
Would women find it harder to run if they were wearing prosthetic, heavier boobs than their own? Yes.
Would women find it harder to run if they were given an appendage they weren’t used to, and told to run in that – like a kilo’s worth of testicles, for instance? Yes.
Does a man’s physiology have any bearing on how we feel when we run? No.
Isn’t it more important to measure the affect of women’s bodies on their running, and enable them to run better, easier, and without pain? Yes.
How does this experiment help anyone, not least the men running it? It doesn’t.
Who cares how difficult men found it to run with breasts? About five people.
Why weren’t women included in this experiment at all? We don’t know.
We know that our breasts affect how we run – our sports bras are as important as our shoes, and men simply don’t need that secondary piece of running equipment like we do. We also know that the bigger the boobs, the bigger the issue. Bra manufacturers need to step up, be much more size inclusive in their ranges, and study the way that women’s bodies move, how we run, and use that knowledge to create clothing that enables us to run longer, better and without pain. That’s what we know. What do you think?